Lindsey Graham is awesome about 50% of the time. Half the time, he’s that “mavericky” guy that his bestie John McCain claims to be, and the other half of the time he’s the typical GOP talking pointer. This is an example of the former. Sure, he’ll probably atone like every other GOP member who talks trash about Fox News and Glenn Beck, but till now, we’ll give him the ceremonial brownie.

“Only in America can you make that much money crying. Glenn Beck is not aligned with any party. He is aligned with cynicism and there has always been a market for cynics. But we became a great nation not because we are a nation of cynics. We became a great nation because we are a nation of believers.” said Graham.

and then things got crazier:

“I’m here to tell you that those who think the president was not born in Hawaii are crazy.” Then he said the ultimate sin: that Obama is not a closet Muslim.

HOLY SHIT!

In related news (let’s not totally glut up the place with all sorts of articles that say the same thing), the Obama administration has taken on Faux News/Beck head on in relation to the 2016 Olympics. Obama is trying very hard to get the Olympics to be in Chicago in 2016, and the Foxes are trying to smear the hell out of it. From the White House website:

RHETORIC: BECK SAID VANCOUVER LOST $1 BILLION WHEN IT “HAD THE OLYMPICS.” Glenn Beck said, “Vancouver lost, how much was it? they lost a billion dollars when they had the Olympics.” [Transcript, Glenn Beck Show, 9/29/09]

REALITY: VANCOUVER’S OLYMPICS WILL NOT TAKE PLACE UNTIL 2010. Vancouver will host the 2010 Olympic and Paralympic Games from February 12 – 28, 2010 and March 12-21, 2010, respectively. [Vancouver2010.com, accessed 9/29/09]

They also pointed out Fox and the GOP’s fringe lies on ACORN in the statement, for whatever reason. http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/statements/2009/sep/30/steve-doocy/beck-and-others-repeat-claim-white-house-political/

Carrie Prejean, you ignorant slut. You’re intolerant. You’re disgusting. Congratulations, you’re proud for being a terrible human being in the name of God, “standing up for him” just so your little prejudice and desire to keep rights away from people. Yes, I’m going to attack you and everyone else will. You aren’t brave, you aren’t courageous, you’re a cowardly bigot. LOOK AT ME I’M SO GREAT BECAUSE I DON’T WANT GAY PEOPLE TO HAVE THE SAME RIGHTS I DO!

A few days ago, President Jimmy Carter made a controversial statement that a lot of Obama’s opposition, including Joe Wilson’s “YOU LIE!” were in the end, centered around racism. Limbaugh and co. made the argument that Carter was saying that “IF YOU OPPOSE HIM YOU’RE A RACIST OMG.”, which most of us could believe if we didn’t see all those damn 9/12 pictures from…the day before. Limbaugh called for a reprimand of those comments and couldn’t get enough of it. Well, thanks for proving Carter’s point, you big hunk of oxycontin.

Referring to an incident in which a white student was beaten by black students on a bus, Limbaugh said: “I think the guy’s wrong. I think not only it was racism, it was justifiable racism. I mean, that’s the lesson we’re being taught here today. Kid shouldn’t have been on the bus anyway. We need segregated buses — it was invading space and stuff. This is Obama’s America.”

The full transcript (don’t read it) is at Media Matters, right here: http://mediamatters.org/limbaughwire/2009/09/15#0023

“In Obama’s America, the white kids now get beat up with the black kids cheering, ‘Yay, right on, right on, right on, right on,” Limbaugh also said. “I wonder if Obama’s going to come to come to the defense of the assailants the way he did his friend Skip Gates up there at Harvard.”

“White Americans are racists who have created what they call free markets that really just enslave the rest of America and her trading partners,” “I mean, it was white Americans that ran off Van Jones. No, look, let’s just follow Eric Holder’s advice and not be cowards about all this. Let’s have an open conversation, an honest conversation about all of our typical white grandmothers. You had one, I had one. Obama had one. They’re racists just like our students are. ACORN — hey, nothing but racism fueling the pursuit of ACORN.”

And the biggest doozie of them all…HOLY SHIT.

“If homosexuality being inborn is what makes it acceptable, why does racism being inborn not make racism acceptable?” “I’m sorry — I mean, this is the way my mind works. But apparently now we don’t choose racism, we just are racists. We are born that way. We don’t choose it. So shouldn’t it be acceptable, excuse — this is according to the way the left thinks about things.”

I’ll make a post soon about just how ridiculous all this ACORN stuff has become, speaking of ACORN, an issue completely made up out of the air that has resulted in ACORN losing their funding from the government, proving that the Democratic Party is at this time, a completely useless entity, and this Republican “minority” is merely just crappy theater. A crappy theater littered with racists, crazies, and profiteers.

1959: (RACE MIXING IS COMMUNISM)

2009: (…WHATEVER OBAMA IS DOING THAT THEY THINK IS COMMUNISM IS COMMUNISM)

This brave man walked through the anti-health care crowd with his large poster and was immediately set upon by the crowd. One person spit on him, while others pushed and tried to grab his flag until the police intervened. Most of the crowd around him turned on him like rabid dogs, yelling epithets and things like commie, why don’t you leave this country etc. Impressively, he remained unflappable and had this little smile on the whole time. UPDATE: THIS MAN IS ON VIDEO. THE CROWD…HOLY SHIT. THE SCREAMS, THE BOOS, THE “GET OUT OF THE COUNTRY YOU COMMUNISM.”

Thief. Not thieve. Thief. Holy shitballs. Also yes, this is a photo album of crazy.

Yes, MSNBC and NBC are two different companies. Yep. Every news outlet except Fox is pushing Obama’s propaganda. Have any of these people ever WATCHED any of these networks?

Pretty sure the confederates didn’t write the constitution.

Get it? They’re killing grammy!

Unnecessary quotation marks are unnecessary.

“Yes, if anyone can be compared to Hitler, its a half-black president and a gay jewish congressman” – Jon Stewart. But hey, they got Dubya in there?

Yes, America died as soon as a liberal was president. Like that hasn’t happened before. Oh wait, I’m giving them too much credit, it’s because he’s black. Yeah.

Unnecessary quotation marks are unnecessary 2: Electric Boogaloo

I don’t even think this one makes any sense. But that man’s shirt…is he trying to say that all liberals are homosexual or something? Oh yeah, they are, because they read and stuff. They also must not be American either, since to not be pro-gun, or Christian, or conservative means…yeah. Seriously, go die in a fire, man.

Stay classy.

Lying about what? Ask all of you that, crowd of full pockets.

This is why natural selection created friendly fire.

I’ll add more.

Michelle Malkin and Glenn Beck Beck are claiming “2 Million” turned out and all the blogs are parroting it….but wait! Maybe the right wing nutters aren’t so crazy! They have the photo to prove it! EDIT: FOX NEWS REPORTS 2 MILLION AT 9/12 EVENT, NATION PARK REPORTS 70,000, USA TODAY, OTHER OUTLETS REPORT “TENS OF THOUSANDS”. OH HELL YES.

Except this photo is from a religious rally in the 90’s, apparently.

Here’s the actual traffic cam image from today:

Another photo from the event- while it was in full swing:

Glenn Beck. Michelle Malkin. YOU LIE! YOU LIE! YOU LIE! (those two words are permanently in the lexicon now, deal with it). YOU LIE! YOU LIE! YOU LIE! The 9/12 protests were today and you are going around saying that over 2 million people showed up, and that the image above was the scene today. Turns out, you LIE! You lie SO MUCH, that 99.4% of what’s in that image WAS NOT THERE. THE IMAGE WAS TAKEN TEN YEARS AGO. HOLY SHIT.

While I don’t really agree with EVERYTHING on display in this really purdy typography experiment that someone did for VlogBrother John Green and his big public option healthcare rant, it is clear that he just about did beat the ideological shit out of the right without ever mentioning anyone by name and never addressing anything they’ve ever said. It’s pretty awesome actually how effectively he says what he says without actually saying anything related to the main talking points of the issue, almost too awesome. He just about falls off the wagon only to catch himself and pwn my ass by using it to prove a point that works exceptionally well. Way to cut through the ideologies of everyone, reveal what they’re REALLY thinking, and then show them how what they say is bullpucky, John.

Michele, Michele, Michele, you crazy human being. You think the liberals want you to go away because you’re going to be the first woman president and that we’re taking our country back and blah blah blah just shut up. Fact is Michele, you make no sense, and I want you around, I want you in Washington, because as long as you’re here being an irrational, despicable human being, you will cause me great enjoyment and rack up funds for the candidates who run against you and your cronies. This all comes from a circle jerk interview with WorldNetDaily which is hard to listen to only because of how by-the-numbers it is with its trolling, “I don’t know who or what or anything, but MSNBC…” and “Bachmann and Palin are America’s greatest because I’d do stuff to them.” and such. Listen if you dare.

Okay, now this is just getting tiresome and most of all, unprecedented. Obama is having a 20-minute broadcast to every school in America on Tuesday, September 8th, and from the sound of it, it’s going to be worthless, harmless, and just some inspirational hooplah. I remember watching George W. Bush a few times in grade school on the classroom television, and it was just that. But there’s something different this time…and it’s just awesome. I’ll give you the first thing and make you keep reading: For Bush to broadcast to every school, it was no problem, but now that it’s Obama, they want us to get permission slips signed. Are you frakking kidding me?

The assumption (fact, actually) here is that if you didn’t vote for Obama, you hate the man and want him killed and don’t want your kid being in the same room where his picture and his voice are present. The line in the sand is so opaque now that Partisan Moses has split them like the Red Sea. Some school districts in America are refusing to air it altogether because of how many angry calls they received from parents over it, naturally, all in red state areas. …WHAT.

A girl in my fifth hour Spanish class even commented on the fact that she’s not going to be in school that day because there’s no way her dad would allow it, and while it was a “joke”, previous experience has let me well aware that she will absolutely not watch it. It’s just not going to happen. The GOP is like Mark Kermode with a Quentin Tarantino movie. They were always going to passionately hate a liberal president in a post-9/11 world no matter what in a way that hasn’t been seen in a lifetime, and any thought otherwise was merely a facade.

I expect to be thoroughly indifferent when I watch on Tuesday, assuming my suburban joe six pack you betcha high school doesn’t end up having to cancel it after the unparalled rage takes its toll. Flame away.

At least that is what http://glennbeckrapedandmurderedayounggirlin1990.com/ would lead you to believe. A FARK meme, this whole thing is something that I will believe no matter how much truth their is to it. If you read after the jump, someone stated perfectly why this is indeed a real thing that should be taken seriously despite all the tomfoolery and fun made with it. Besides, he has stated multiple times that he is a male supremacist and that a consensus is unnecessary for sex. He also hates 9/11 victims families yet wants America to revert to a 9/12 mentality, which his viewers insist is going back to the unity and patriotism of 9/12/01, while he’s clearly endorsing that we became paranoid nationalist schizos. And…he raped and murdered a girl. Glenn Beck is a rapist. Glenn Beck is a murderer. You’re a murderer, you’re a hater, you’re a life destroyer. lololol. Turns out there’s police records too.

Master of Bombdiggityshire Pat Grubb puts it perfectly: “All I want is for him to show us proof that he didn’t rape that girl. I don’t think that’s unreasonable. If he has nothing to hide, why can’t he produce a police report? Look, I don’t know that he raped and murdered that girl in 1990. But I do know that a girl was raped and murdered in 1990 and Glenn Beck still has yet to comment on it. I don’t know that he did it, I don’t have any evidence, but I fear that he did.”

EDIT #1: Turns out Glenn Beck in 2001 wanted to kill people with shovels and when he said “GET OFF MY PHONE”, he would call them bitches on the radio instead of pinheads.

Literally. Like, really, truly, actually, completely. The most progressive (into the ground) member of the House of Representative, Minnesota congresswoman and bonafide crazy person Michele Bachmann has thrown down the funniest thing I’ve heard in the healthcare debacle. The woman has gone outright biblical and it’s awesome. It’s AWESOME.

In summation, republicans need to “slit their wrists and become blood brothers against health care reform.” Slit. Their. Wrists. Well Michele, make sure to remember that it’s down the road, not across the street.

“This [health care reform] cannot pass…What we have to do today is make a covenant, to slit our wrists, be blood brothers on this thing. This will not pass. We will do whatever it takes to make sure this doesn’t pass…Right now, we are looking at reaching down the throat and ripping the guts out of freedom. And we may never be able to restore it if we don’t man up and take this one on.”

This was only supposed to be a legislative briefing but turned into a Bachmann masturbation fest, filled with stuff like “you’re with me or against me.” and bragging about how she’s “the second most hated republican woman in America.” Nah, you’re first. Everyone loves Sarah Palin and are just too afraid it, considering how they all believed her death panel lie that started with her. Let’s face it, she COULD win in 2012. Nobody would say they’d vote for her, but it’s only you and the ballot in that booth.

It seems like Bachmann is trying to do some sort of run for something bigger, or…something. God told her to run in 2012 I assume and she’s definitely the kind of person to take on the challenge and even win a few states. I can’t wait.

After the death of Senator Ted Kennedy, what started with Cynthia Tucker from the Atlanta Journal-Constitution is now becoming a full fledged Washington meme, that John McCain, former Presidential candidate and spineless conformist, is being played up as “the new Ted Kennedy”, being the Washington Maverick who takes charge of everything. If he started acting a little more like his daughter and less like…every other schmuck in the senate with that dastardly little R next to their name, I’d believe it. Right now, I don’t.

I could restate it, but allow me to quote ThinkProgress with the connection between Kennedy and McCain.

Ted Kennedy said “Americans want the choice of enrolling in a health insurance program backed by the government for the public good”; McCain says we have to “abandon the public option.” Kennedy joined with McCain to push aggressively for comprehensive immigration reform in 2007, a bill that McCain “would not” vote for anymore. Kennedy is remembered as a passionate gay rights advocate; McCain thinks discrimination against gays in the military is “working well.” See the similarities?

I knew there was going to be a firestorm after the death of Senator Ted Kennedy, but I didn’t know it was going to be so much fun. The Twitterverse is jam-packed with conservative punditry today, going nuts with joy over the death of Kennedy, even though even the fringiest of fringe conservatives are showing their respect. Granted, if Twitter was a big deal when Reagan died, I’m sure it would have caused some left-wing vitriol, but it didn’t, so it didn’t. However, the reason I consider it National Retarded Republican Twitter Day is because the worst of it has nothing to do with Kennedy. Read it all after the jump.

The biggest offender is blowhard Andrew Breitbart, who spent the day writing dozens of tweets about the same thing, calling Kennedy all sorts of names to the point of redundancy. If you have to say a 140 character message 20 different times with synonyms, don’t say it at all.

Let’s run these down one by one:

A subtle jab in there somewhere Michelle? It’s certainly possible. It’s a heavily veiled tweet, definitely too much so to be nice but almost admirable in its lack of transparency, making it seem all the more malicious. I like it, actually.

Eric Erikson and Michael Johns went full retard.

Yes, Ted Kennedy did like pootang.

And of course, all the TED KENNEDY LET THAT GIRL DROWN OMG LOL people:

And of course, Meghan McCain comes along, as the conservative of reason, who after this healthcare thing, I’m convinced she’s more of a Democrat than 90% of the Senate. Admit it, Blogette.

BUT THE WORST THING OF TODAY IS IN RESPONSE TO OBAMA’S REACTION TO THE NEW ORLEANS WRECKAGE LEFT BEHIND BY THE BUSH ADMINISTRATION, ABOUT REBUILDING AND REFORTIFYING THE CITY.

Yes, so poor black people are human debris. Die please, Neal Boortz.

I’ve been absolutely irked by Trent Franks (R, AZ) since before I can even remember. He’s the House Rep. from my district, and his influence on my area is just painful. The man has only won every election he’s ever won because of his campaign strategy, which is to place his name with lots of pictures of kids with big sunglasses and little babies. The electorate falls for this crap every single time, and I learned this the hard way, watching people vote for him because “he’s got a cute family”, except the kids in his ads WERE NOT EVEN HIS. They were stock photographs. So every four years, two years, it seems like a neverending saga, I have to see his signs far more often than I ever would want to. He has no integrity, which was a belief just perpetuated by hearing how much of a miserable dick he is to his neighbors whenever he’s in his house located in my neighborhood, and the fact that his campaign office just about never answers calls or reads emails. But you know what, that’s not THAT much of a problem. It’s not like he’s Lady MacBachmann or something. Oh wait, yes, yes he is. He’s a wacko. A complete and total wacko.

Not too long ago, blogger Mike Stark approached Franks and mentioned the whole Birther lollercaust, and Franks said “I believe Barack Obama was born in Hawaii, when Hawaii was a state — in the United States — and therefore he’s a constitutionally natural-born citizen of this country.” But THAT was then, but now at a town hall in my district, the little attention whore Franks is going to FILE A LAWSUIT AGAINST OBAMA. From Mohave Daily News:

The other main issue dealt with numerous speakers questioning Obama’s birth certificate and why there wasn’t an investigation into whether he is a naturalized citizen. One woman said a newspaper announcement of his birth in Hawaii was not sufficient. Another asked how he could have a passport without a birth certificate.

Franks said there was not enough evidence that Obama is not an American citizen. He did say there was a lot of conflicting evidence of Obama’s citizenship and that he was considering filing a lawsuit, the only congressman to do so. Franks asked why the president did not simply produce a birth certificate.

The man also believes “Americans will wish Bush was back as president.” Yes, and I’d rather have Rush Limbaugh’s butt sweat as a congressman.

Congratulations, you’re a birther. Go step into the line of unparalleled intellectual failure.